Ellie Goulding shares emotional message on anxiety, mental health and her grandfather’s suicide

Ellie Goulding has shared an emotional message about mental health awareness and her grandfather taking his own life.

The singer-songwriter has been vocal throughout the years about her own battles with “paralysing” anxiety and panic attacks, and this week took to Instagram to honour other artists who have been open – as well as others who may be struggling with similar issues to her.

“We all have a right to feel what we do, whatever it is, whoever we are – exhilaration, madness, absolutely nothing at all, confusion, chronic sadness,” she wrote. “I can sometimes feel all these things in the space of a few days. I am beyond relieved that more light is being shone on the complexity of going from being a touring artist/ performer to going straight back to normality on a regular basis. The constant change of pace is sometimes just too much to bare. Thank you to those artists who have spoken so candidly about it lately.”

• READ MORE: The five Dos and Don’ts of talking about mental health

She continued: “I know I chose this job, but nothing could have prepared me for the ups and downs that come with it. I know for sure that a lot of my anxiety has come from what they call ‘imposter syndrome; not believing in myself enough and thinking that I don’t deserve happiness, which results in wanting to sabotage my own success. I keep my head straight by training every day (running and boxing mainly) and although it is so hard sometimes to be motivated, the feeling of blood pumping through my veins and a human body performing the way it so impressively does reminds me how cool it is to be alive.”

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Sorry this is a little late, but I had to speak about about Mental Health Awareness, for what it’s worth. We all have a right to feel what we do, whatever it is, whoever we are- Exhilaration, madness, absolutely nothing at all, confusion, chronic sadness… (I can sometimes feel all these things in the space of a few days). I am beyond relieved that more light is being shone on the complexity of going from being a touring artist/ performer to going straight back to normality on a regular basis. The constant change of pace is sometimes just too much to bare. Thank you to those artists who have spoken so candidly about it lately. I know I chose this job but nothing could have prepared me for the ups and downs that come with it. I know for sure that a lot of my anxiety has come from what they call “imposter syndrome” not believing in myself enough and thinking that I don’t deserve happiness, which results in wanting to sabotage my own success. I keep my head straight by training every day (running and boxing mainly) and although it is so hard sometimes to be motivated, the feeling of blood pumping through my veins and a human body performing the way it so impressively does reminds me how cool it is to be alive. Today I’m thinking about my grandfather, who took his own life a few years back. I wish I had spoken to him more, and wish we could have had even the smallest clue of how unhappy he was. I admire those who get out of bed every morning and seize the day, even when they’re not feeling too great. That requires a lot of courage. Please know that you are doing amazingly and I’m proud of you. Ellie xx #mentalhealthawareness

A post shared by elliegoulding (@elliegoulding) on Oct 14, 2019 at 2:43am PDT

Paying tribute to her grandfather who took his own life several years ago, Goulding added: “I wish I had spoken to him more, and wish we could have had even the smallest clue of how unhappy he was.

“I admire those who get out of bed every morning and seize the day, even when they’re not feeling too great. That requires a lot of courage. Please know that you are doing amazingly and I’m proud of you.”

Last week to mark World Mental Health Day, Nick Cave shared some moving advice to a 16-year-old fan on body positivity, while James Blake posted an emotional essay on his past battles with suicidal thoughts and the depression and anxiety he suffered as a result of being bullied as a teenager.

In the piece, Blake concluded by praising his girlfriend Jameela Jamil, who encouraged him to stop comparing his mental health struggles to others, after he felt his struggle was “comparatively tiny”.

“My girlfriend verbally slapped some sense into me, saying it does not help anybody, least of all oneself, to compare pain,” he wrote.

For help and advice on mental health:

• ‘Am I depressed?‘ – Help and advice on mental health and what to do next
• Help Musicians UK – Around the clock mental health support and advice for musicians
• Music Support Org – Help and support for musicians struggling with alcoholism, addiction, or mental health issues
• YOUNG MINDS – The voice for young people’s health and wellbeing
• CALM – The Campaign Against Living Miserably for young men
• Time To Change – Let’s end mental health discrimination
• The Samaritans – Confidential support 24 hours a day